Sweet Counsel

Enjoying the whole counsel of God's Word is truly sweet

The Truth About Good Sex

Sex is not a bad thing. Nor should it be a “taboo” subject among Christians. Not only should the subject not be “off-limits,” it should be talked about regularly in Christian circles. Why? Because as a Christian people, we desperately need to grasp a proper understanding of sex, Biblically speaking. Otherwise, we will continue to allow our culture to teach us instead of the Lord. I submit to you that the only way to change the tide on this trend is to have some real dialogue on the matter in a way the honors and glorifies our Lord. We must stop avoiding this subject among our sisters.

Cultural Influence

Ladies, we live in a culture that has idolized the act of sex and turned it into something the Lord never intended it to be. Books like “50 Shades of Grey” and movies like “Magic Mike” have made women – unfortunately even Christian women – more confused than ever about what to expect from our sexual relationships.

Our culture has even changed our language on how we approach the subject. Children are taught in schools at ages as young as 10 years old that sex is “natural” and we only need to be “safe” when we engage in it. According to our culture, sex is merely an act between two animals and holds no seriousness.

Even more devastating than that is the amount of women who are brainwashed by the culture to think things like pornography and physical abuse are simply ways to “increase intimacy” in the marriage bed. Dear sister in Christ, please hear me when I tell you those things are based in lust alone. And once a lustful temptation is carried through to sin, it brings about death. (James 1:13-15) The death of a healthy marriage bed in this case. This is not at all what the Lord intended when He designed our bodies to work in harmony with a man’s in the confines of the covenant of marriage.

The Lord’s Original Design

Sex is a gift from the Lord. Rightly done within a marriage bed, sex is a wonderful, beautiful thing. Marriage is a covenantal relationship between husband, wife, and the Lord Himself. Sex is the resulting gift the Lord has bestowed upon the married couple. (Genesis 2:25) The Lord has made sex a pleasurable thing and, within marriage, it is absolutely appropriate to find joy within its celebration of spousal oneness.

This area of the covenantal relationship is where the culture will never be able to teach us the true purpose of sex. God Himself designed man and woman. (Genesis 2:21-24) Without getting inappropriately descriptive, consider the oneness that happens when a husband and wife join together in physical union. It is so much more than a physical union. A married, Christian couple experiences the very presence of the Holy Spirit within their oneness. This is the aspect of the sexual relationship that the culture can never understand, yet is constantly desperate to imitate.

The Holy Spirit: Our Culture’s Missing Link

Consider this concept with me for a moment. Every believer has the Holy Spirit living within them at the moment of salvation. (Romans 8:9-11) This means that when we participate in marital oneness with our husbands, we are inviting the Holy Spirit to not only bless what we are doing, but also to participate in the union along with us. (1 Corinthians 6:15-20) While this is true for every single thing we do in our earthly tents, consider the magnitude of impact just this one idea could have on your marriage:

#1 Zero “Shades of Grey”

No longer is there a question of whether or not we should participate in the lustful acts mentioned earlier that [wrongly] promise to “increase intimacy.” Those types of things clearly grieve the Holy Spirit, and since He is participating in the moment with us, it would be absurd to ask Him to take part in such grievousness.

#2 A Holy Sexual Union

Sex becomes more than just a physical act. When we realize that the Holy Spirit is participating with us, we also understand that He produces a spiritual connection to our husband who is a fellow believer. This is an unparalleled connection that we simply cannot have with any other human on earth other than our husbands. This is the one thing no one else can understand but us as a couple. This type of oneness is only possible through the power of the Holy Spirit. And the world will never understand the connection, no matter how hard the enemy works to counterfeit it.

Guard Against Counterfeits

Dear, sweet sister in Christ, lean really close while I encourage you… Do not let the enemy’s counterfeits creep into your marriage. Protect your marriage bed with the Sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God. When the enemy of your marriage tries to tempt you with the lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh, and the boastful pride of life, remember that the Lord Himself designed marriage and the beautiful, appropriate, wholesome union of sex between believing spouses. (1 John 2:16)

Now, thank the Lord for His design and then go find your husband and tell him you love him. 🙂

This article was originally posted at Glory Books with a corresponding podcast. Check out the original post and podcast here

Guest Post: How to Survive a Wimpy Women’s Ministry

Honored to Guest Post on Michelle Lesley’s blog today…

Michelle Lesley

If your theology pretty much matches up with mine (as outlined in the “Welcome” and “Statement of Faith” tabs) and you’d like to contribute a guest post, drop me an e-mail at,
and let’s chat about it.
Kim Wine Wimpy Womens Ministry

How to Survive a Wimpy Women’s Ministry
by Kim Wine

Vanessa was excited to attend the weeknight women’s ministry event. A new friend had recently invited her to their annual women’s conference. Vanessa’s own church was extremely small and had no women’s ministry, so she was excited to attend an event that would edify her and train her in righteousness through the Word of God. She walked in with joyful expectation of tools to help her in her spiritual growth.

Upon entering the event, Vanessa was given her itinerary. The day was filled with craft projects, networking activities, and tips on how to create a more hospitable home environment. Vanessa maintained an…

View original post 1,181 more words

The Beautiful Demolition Project

Crying is not something I do.

Hugging? Not really into that.

Feelings? I may have tripped and fallen into some of those occasionally, but it’s not normal for me to experience those.

Continue reading “The Beautiful Demolition Project”

Where Are My Sackcloth And Ashes?

Friends, it’s time. It’s high time. It is time we mourned over our sin. Continue reading “Where Are My Sackcloth And Ashes?”

I’m a Harlot and So Are You

Harlotry. A word most of us would rather not say, much less discuss in a candid way. Yet, we can all identify with harlotry Continue reading “I’m a Harlot and So Are You”

When Your Feet Fail You

I’m pretty sure most of the time that I’m just screwing everything up. Can you relate? Continue reading “When Your Feet Fail You”

Hope for Our “Idols of the Heart”

Yesterday on the Women’s Hope Podcast over at Glory Books Ministry, we had the honor of having best-selling author and speaker Elyse Fitzpatrick stop in to chat with us Continue reading “Hope for Our “Idols of the Heart””

Ugly Photos and 7-Year Fights

CAUTION! Utterly, brutally honest photo ahead!!! Continue reading “Ugly Photos and 7-Year Fights”

Hope for Depression

Enjoy this week’s edition of the Women’s Hope Podcast from Glory Books. Click this link and you’ll see an article by yours truly on ditching the “church mask.” Then stick around and listen to Kimberly, Brandi, and me talk about the topic of depression. What is it Biblically-speaking and how can we apply the truth of the gospel to our depressed state?


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